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All these are hypothetical of course.

Somebody looked for Liam Neeson, found him and killed him.

M. Night Shyamalan lives into his 80s, then dies in a hospital bed of old age, with no sudden surprises at the end.

Leonardo DiCaprio, slips on his way to receiving his first Oscar, gets hit on his head and departs.

Robert Downey Jr. dying of anaemia (iron deficiency).

The Rock (Dwayne Johnson) dies from a paper cut.

Johnny Depp is killed by pirates.

“Chris Brown was beaten to death by a woman last night.”

Uma Thurman killed by a man named Bill.

Mick Jagger killed by a rolling stone.

Benedict Cumberbatch falling from a building.

John Travolta shot in the head in the backseat of a car.

Bill Gates dies waiting for a webpage to open on Explorer.

Michael Phelps drowns.

Keifer Sutherland killed by terrorists.

Bear Grylls‘ grisly death by bear while grilling Grilled Grizzly Bear.

Hugh Laurie / House MD dies of lupus!

Daniel Radcliffe: Dies while watching a magic show.

Denzel Washington: Killed by a white man, who secretly, was his slave.

Kenny doesn’t die.

In the days and weeks following Chuck Norris’ suicide, he dies after getting revenge upon his killer.

All of this while this man continues to live forever.

 

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